Feeling like Rose from The African Queen

Well its July and the mosquitoes are drunk on my blood, my hair is higher then it was in the 80's/90's, I drink more water then an in-ground pool and sweat like a menopausal woman in a sauna; it's July in the Keys and I wouldn't prefer to be anywhere else!

The rainy season of course brings rain so I get to break out my lime green/pink polka dotted golashes that I love :) It can be beautiful weather and with a quick directional change of wind and a sudden coolness to the air it will rain like the world is ending. Crazy winds, waves, rain, thunder, and lightning make for a pretty awesome sight out on the water. Unlike NY the rain does not break the humidity, rather you go from sweating in 90% humidity, to being 90% soaking wet, to sweating in 90% humidity all over again. I simply gave in yesterday and just ran around in the rain with the dog!

DEET is my new addiction, I mean seriously some people smoke, I lather up in DEET each day I have to work outside. I have lost compassion for some living creatures, that is squirrels, wasps and misquitoes. I will spray them mid flight if need be (this goes for all three). The squirrels that live on the beach near the hut I work in are so aggressive that each morning I spray them with a strong hose in order to let them know I am not the nice counter chick who feeds them...oh no...I'm the b*tch who wishes you would simple get the f-off the beach so I can work in peace. The wasps atleast provide entertainment, see they don't actually sting but all the tourists on the beach assume they do and they run frantically screaming, swatting, and just about crying up and down the beach so I get a few good laughs in each day! And don't think I am evil...after they come running my way I let them know that the wasps are harmless.

Bathing suit etiquette should be a class provided in flight while those from other states fly into FL. It your large that doesn't mean your ugly but it does mean your clothing size is L not XS. Klingons are for Star Trek, not what a mans bathing suit should be doing do his crotch. Leopard print is wrong no matter who is wearing it. It is hot here, the sun is closer to us, use sunscreen or get served as lobster to other unassuming tourists. I am starting to think alot of men are pregnant and that this is simply not making the news just yet. Now I know I sound like a horrible human being, but just know that some days are so quiet at work that we have coconut throwing contests. I love people watching and without the "crazies" it would be no fun, so deep down I love these people for keeping me entertained.

So on a daily bases life is different down here, but; good, entertaining, and laid back. I will try to update more often about daily life here in the Keys. Oh and as a wise fortune cookie once told me "if you feed a squirrel, be prepared to get bitten." :)